Today's Tip: Keep a graph of your weight. The day to day seems frustrating but when you look over time you see how much progress you are making!
No more BCPs!! I took the last one yesterday! You should see my graph. A nice steady downward motion until I start those pills and then BAM - evens out to straight. Since I have other meds to take for the transfer still, I'm not expecting much different now I guess. I'm still glad to be done with those.
Yesterday I decided to see what would happen if I ran again. My left foot is still really hurting but I called the PT to ask about it. They don't think it is anything serious - they called it 'compensation pain'. Basically, when my toes got bruised from something falling on my foot awile back, different parts of my foot took over the efforts of walking and such. That made THOSE parts start to hurt so different areas again took over and now those areas are hurting from the effort. This sounds dumb to me as my toes never really hurt all that much and it was weeks ago, but whatever. I don't really care, as long as he told me he didn't think it was anything serious. My knees were borderline, which was partly why I wanted to see what would happen if I ran. I really stretched out that foot and slowly gained speed from a long walk. Eventually there was minimal pain but that foot thing never 100% went away. I was a little worried about landing on it funny and actually breaking something but that never happened. My knees, however, were fine. I got up to 6.3 MPH and ran at that rate from about 8-9 minutes until 20 minutes. Then I put it down to 5.5 to rest a bit and at 2 miles I upped it to 6.0 again and finished out the 3 miles. (I hadn't hit 2 miles at 20 minutes because I had been walking pretty slow for the first 5 minutes.) Actually, I did 7.5 for the last .05 of a mile. :) Then I walked more and stretched everything out.
As I walked back to the locker room, my knees hit back as did my foot. Neither one were happy with me. I was pretty sad because I was hoping that my ability to run consistantly was worked up. However, as the night went on and now the next morning came, the pain has really gone away. Maybe my endurance really is toughening up.
I decided to do the elliptical today so I went my 30 minutes at level 15. Now, either I'm becoming a wuss after so much time NOT on the elliptical, or level 15 is a lot harder because I barely broke 500 cals this morning and my heart rate never really went over the 150s. Usually it is more around 160-170 for the duration. Mix that with the dumb weight that keeps going up and down from 159 to 162 and back instead of actually losing anything and I get worried that I'm slacking with too many days off and not really pushing. Well, really just the weekends when I know I'm not working out as consistantly as I used to... that and I've been so MUNCHIE lately. OH, that makes me think of the "I can make you thin" dork. "Eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full." Ya dumbass - if it was THAT easy I'd have never gained the weight in the first place. I KNOW I'm not supposed to eat when I'm full. That doesn't mean I follow through with what I know. Do you really think I'm so stupid that I'm going.. "I'm not really hungry so I don't really need this package of mini-doughnuts from the vending machine... but It's probably healthy for me anyway so I'll eat it." NO, I'm screaming, "Hey fat-ass, what the hell are you doing? You KNOW this is why you can't fit into the pants you want!" While downing doughnut number 5 and drinking a hot chocolate from the coffee station.
Well, I used to anyway. Losing weight isn't really about someone telling you to eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full. To me, anyway, it is about valuing yourself and your body enough to take care of it even when the vending machines are calling your name. It is about saying "My life and my health are important enough to not give in to that." It is also about an overall picture of working out partnered with generally healthy eating so that when you DO find yourself eating doughnuts - they can't hurt you so much. Now I just have to find out how to keep this up when my guiding compass, my daily weight, is not really guiding anymore. After yesterday's 162 and today's 161 My 'zen' with my weight numbers has about had it. Still - nothing I can do about it. I'm not giving in and losing my path and that's all.
