May 1, 2008 9:21 A.M. Weight: 159.0 lbs.

I missed my 1 year anniversary for starting all of this. I'd have to look back but it was about last Friday. I've had 70 pounds off since then - about 60 of those pounds I've had off and kept off for 5 months now. (Yes, I've only lost 10 pounds in the last 5 months - BUT - I've maintained under my goal weight for 5 months.) See, it's all in how you look at it. I've also gone since that date with exercising very nearly a minimum of 20 minutes 5 days every week. (I've missed that a week or two, I believe.) I'm trying to find some way to infuse some humor to this, however I'm just too dang busy being honest and happy about myself to do so.

A couple days ago I got an e-mail from our surrogacy agency asking me if I had gotten BCPs and started them. Yes, thank you ever so much for giving me your credit card number to use without your knowledge as I have not only purchased and received a month supply of BCPs, but I've been distributing Lupron and PIO and several other fun street drugs out of my home for the past week. Don't worry, I've kept receipts for everything. Or, um, no - I have not spontaneously found and started taking any BCPs. They made the choice that since I'm pretty regular anyway (at least I was before they shot up my system with all sorts of drugs - hopefully that is still the case) they will just forgo the BCPs for me and trust that my system will behave as needed once the egg donor gets on track. I believe that the egg donor was supposed to get her period about the same time that I did with last cycle, so around the end of March. We were baffled at the beginning of April as to what was happening. At this point, now May, one does start to wonder what is going on. We were hoping before the holidays for a Feb transfer. Then all the legal stuff took so long that we were hoping to capture the March/April timeframe. Now I'm basically thinking we're at least into June. The delay is frustrating, to say the least. At least now we're getting to a spring birthday so Paul should be happy about a lower RSV risk for the early days.

Well, I'm happy to announce that there will be no porn spam mail for me!! I DID get in my 5 miles today! The machine even told me I averaged 6 MPH for those 5 miles, however the time was 50 minutes 20 seconds so I know I didn't average 6 MPH. That's OK though because I was aiming for a nice long 5 mile run, not a kill-yourself pushed fast as possible 5 mile run. Now I get to keep running the 5 miles instead of continuing to add .25 miles on each time. I will not lie to you - I do not TOTALLY hate running. There are some moments while I'm going that I feel like I'm flying. Like I'm totally free and grooving to my own montage. (I'm such a dork that it was a Billy Joel song that came on today that had me really moving!) At those times, I feel like I could go forever. The trouble is that as soon as I think "Oh WOW I've hit runvanna." it ends and I'm pushing and struggling to keep going again. I wish that I could spend more time in that state. I wonder - for you runners out there - as you train and get better at it, does that state get easier to attain?

I biked yesterday - real biking - not at the gym. I went from my house, down past where my kids go for daycare, and up around the business area by my house. I was out for about an hour. It is so frustrating to bike around my home because there is nothing for bikes. There isn't even a shoulder on a lot of the places. I even rode past the high school and there was no bike path, shoulder, sidewalk, ANYTHING. That is such a sad statement. It makes me want to go to arms and start a campaign to get more bike friendly streets. I would if I ever had spare time in my life, which I don't. Thus, I'll spend my time whining about it and hope it has the same effect.