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Welcome to my blog. I'm Robyn. I was born in October '74 (so I don't have to keep upping my age every year.) I'm married to Kris, my military guy that married me, a pagan hippie. I have 4 children, 3 living, I work fulltime as an IT business analyst (aka - computer dork) and I have worked very hard to get out from under obesity. This blog was originally about the weight loss journey, however now it is about my life. After having lost my 2nd child, Anily, during her full term delivery after a perfectly normal pregnancy, I got involved in a group called "Missing Grace". That is a group that helps people through pregnancy and infant loss, infertility, and adoption. Through this group I found an agency that helped me to DO SOMETHING about all the infertility I saw around me every day. I am in the beginning of a surrogacy journey in which I will be the gestational carrier. I've never done this before so I have to admit I don't know all of what I'm about to take on. I guess we'll find out. In the meantime, I'll blog about my life. My stillbirth, parenting, weightloss, maintaining, working, surrogacy, whatever else happens, life.



The Human Race 8K - 56:17
The Bunker Hills Run 8K - 50:20
Eagan Fun Run 2 mile - 20:05, 5 mile - 54:07

Operation Life
Thursday, 10 April 2008
Canceled Cycle

April 10, 2008 8:57 A.M. Weight: 159.0 lbs.

Back to 159!! The scale did that "false number" thing to me again this morning where it settles on something for ~5 seconds and then flips. I had 158 at first and almost died. 159 is still good.

We found out yesterday that the transfer date out in Toronto is pushed out. The egg donor had a bad cycle so they are going to start her (and me) over. I'm getting overnighted some progesterone shots that I need to do intramuscularly for 12 days and then I should get my period and THEN we restart. I am only taking 1 Estrace pill now instead of the 3 I was taking. It's all very sad and of course I feel bad for the guys beacuse a failed cycle is never fun. On the less emotional side of things, this also causes potential trouble because 6-7 weeks out from now is the start of birthday/anniversary marathon time for my kids and my mom. She has reservations at this camping ground for her anniversary and for that matter, Kris and I have been invited to a family camping trip that I REALLY want to go to. Plus Ash's birthday is the 22nd so.. do I plan his birthday party anyway and deal with moving it if I have to, or do I plan on having his birthday party later with Jessie near June 2nd? Is that late enough? Last - I'm a little on edge about the whole thing because a transfer at the end of May would put my due date on or near Feb 23rd which is Anily's birthday and I don't know how I feel about that. On one hand, it would feel a bit fate-like because she is the inspiration for the path that brought me to do this for these guys. On the other hand, that is HER time and HER date and I don't like having anyone infringe on it - not to mention that I'll have all the physical pregnancy issues mirroring when they happened with her pregnancy and I'll be very due right in the late winter/early spring weather and I tend to get REALLY anxious right around Anily's birthday.

Well - all that kinda bubbles around my head but mostly I just say that it will all work out however it needs to. For now I have progesterone shots to figure out and then a new cycle to start so new Lupron shots. As my friends were quick to point out, this also means I'll have time to get a few more runs under my belt.

Speaking of runs - I think I was a bit premature in my celebration of uber running with no knee pain. On the bright side, it wasn't the same KIND of knee pain this time. I think I did something to the inside of my right knee when I was either running or rowing because when I was stretching - I just looked it up - the gracilis muscle - was really sore and tight right at my knee. I'm guessing that's the right muscle anyway based on what it felt like. It was not kneecap pain though like what I've had before and I'm pretty sure this will resolve as I rest the area. I just did the elliptical today.

BTW - after the discussion regarding numb feet on the elliptical I was paying attention to this. My feet did not get numb during the 30 minutes I was on it however I was picking my feet up almost off the pad on each up-step so I was going just a bit faster than the machine with each step. I wasn't doing anything special to do that - it was my natural stride while on the machine so maybe finding a machine that allows your feet to leave the pads with each step would help.


Posted by robynanne at 9:24 AM CDT
Updated: Thursday, 17 April 2008 10:46 AM CDT

Thursday, 10 April 2008 - 11:21 AM CDT

Name: "Jeanette"
Home Page: http://morrisonbaby.wordpress.com

Robyn,

 Sorry to hear about the canceled cycle.  Hopfully the timing works out okay for you.  But, good luck with the running until then!

 Jeanette

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