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Welcome to my blog. I'm Robyn. I was born in October '74 (so I don't have to keep upping my age every year.) I'm married to Kris, my military guy that married me, a pagan hippie. I have 4 children, 3 living, I work fulltime as an IT business analyst (aka - computer dork) and I have worked very hard to get out from under obesity. This blog was originally about the weight loss journey, however now it is about my life. After having lost my 2nd child, Anily, during her full term delivery after a perfectly normal pregnancy, I got involved in a group called "Missing Grace". That is a group that helps people through pregnancy and infant loss, infertility, and adoption. Through this group I found an agency that helped me to DO SOMETHING about all the infertility I saw around me every day. I am in the beginning of a surrogacy journey in which I will be the gestational carrier. I've never done this before so I have to admit I don't know all of what I'm about to take on. I guess we'll find out. In the meantime, I'll blog about my life. My stillbirth, parenting, weightloss, maintaining, working, surrogacy, whatever else happens, life.



The Human Race 8K - 56:17
The Bunker Hills Run 8K - 50:20
Eagan Fun Run 2 mile - 20:05, 5 mile - 54:07

Operation Life
Friday, 30 May 2008
Resistant To Change

Weight: 161.0 lbs.

Not going up, not going down. Well, not going up a lot, anyway. 161. And to think I was so scared. I will admit that I only ran 3 miles today. I was running late because I left my shampoo and conditioner at my mom's house so I had to stop at the drugstore and pick up some of that.

I have the world's thickest hair. Really. I haven't called Ripley's or the World Record book people or anything but I'm pretty sure I do, in fact, have the world's thickest hair ever. Way back in high school we had a section in our biology class where we were learning to use the microscope to measure things. We were supposed to measure how thick our hair was. The teacher would not believe that I was doing it right based on the thickness measurements of my hair but I was. Also, just to make extra sure I have the world's thickest hair, I have literally THREE strands growing from every follicle or whatever it is called. You can even see that on my arms and such but I'm very lucky in that the hair growing elsewhere than my head is quite blonde and thin and not a big deal. I could go for pretty much ever without shaving my legs and not many would notice. Anyway, I think my point has been made. Thick hair. It is also beaded which just means that the strands are not just straight, they have a bumpy texture to them. Basically, you could take the giantest ponytail holder you could think of and only put it around my ponytail once. When I use a straightening iron on it, it gets slick and lovely and wonderful. When I do not, it is frizzy and afro-like and horrid. I really really hope no one finds anything derogatory about this but I find that products intended for more ethnic women work best in my hair. I found this conditioner that actually said on the bottle "For women of color" and I was pretty excited. Now, however, I find that it is a little weird walking around the gym with hair products that advertise very clearly that they are for "women of color". Because I am THE whitest, dorkiest woman in MN ever, it seems very incongruous to me to have that. Either way, no matter what I use, my hair always seems to be frizzy and horrid unless I beat it into submission with hours of ironing flat.

Whatever - hair products purchased, I made it to the gym and started my workout shortly after 7AM. Yep, running late. I managed my 3 miles and even did it under 30 minutes and finished out the 30 minutes at I think 8.6 MPH just to see if I could do it. I'm still tempted to try that 14 MPH that they did on the Biggest Loser but I fear falling on my face and getting 'treadmill burn' as the machine keeps going.

It was then time for the weigh in I've been dreading for about a week now. When I don't weigh in for long periods of time, I get very nervous. Plus, I've been feeling extra fat and I know I haven't been as good as I should've. I was terrified. Well, 161 was not that bad. It is nice that as long as my body is going to be stubborn about going down any more, it will also be stubborn about going up. I personally think that this is because my current weight has been attained via a lot of working out and eating a lot of HEALTHY foods and not just 'dieting'. This isn't just my theory, I've read it in magazines that are mostly written by people that know what they are talking about - or at least - that's what I think. If you lose weight by simply restricting calories, your metabolism knows what you are up to and has no intention of changing your set point. If you lose weight by changing the content of your calories to high nutrient whole foods and by toning and filling out your muscles and making your heart stronger, your body owns that weight more consistently. Anyway, I hope that is the case. I'm happy that I don't have a ton of ground to make up again. It would be nice to get back to the 156 I saw again. We shall see. I'm on the verge of another weekend. I will be seeing the Sex And The City movie with my girlfriends this weekend so I already know I won't be a saint.


Posted by robynanne at 2:47 PM CDT

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